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Survivor Voices

Lives lived through the lenses of Survival

“Our ten recommended steps for maintaining a life free of abuse, control and revictimization:”

1. We came to realize: We were allowing our choices to be controlled by the trauma we survived.

2. We became accountable: Our choices, behaviors, emotions, thoughts and actions are our responsibility.

3. We embrace: Our freedom from self-sabotage with the forgiveness. “SILENCE IS NOT GOLDEN”

4. We practice: The healthy boundaries learned on how to have safe and healthy persons in our lives.

5. We succeed. By maintaining balance.

6. We empower and not enable.

7. We understand and acknowledge. Not everyone in our lives will grow, change or want to stay.

8. We set the example. Our actions are louder than our words.

9. We maintain rigorous honesty. We are perfect in our imperfections. This keeps us self-aware.

10. We provide a legacy of “Paying it Forward!”

   Take the Time to Listen to the Run- Away.

 First 3 paragraphs written by Sister Mary Rose McGeady 2010 from her book "Sometimes God has a Kid's Face", Posted byTSM August 22 2019

The dark car hurtled down the street, across the avenue from our Outreach van.  Suddenly, the back door opened and a body flew out of the car and rolled several times on the asphalt.


The car screeched to halt, but the tall, but the tall, thin girl who had tumbled out got up and ran towards our van.  "HELP ME! HELP ME!"  she cried, with blood running down her face and arms.  The car raced towards our van, stopped for a long pause, and then finally sped away.


"Are they following us?"  she asked, her body glued to the floor of our van.

"Please, tell me they're gone," she cried.  "They'll kill me if they ever catch me," she said.  She looked up from the floor of our van, tears running down her cheeks.  And blood everywhere.   You can read the entire story in "Sometimes God Has a Kid's Face" written by Sister Mary Rose McGeady

      In 1972, and please let that date sink in.  In 1972 in Times Square a simple, profound mission to rescue homeless kids from the street.  Covenant House is one of the leading voices for the human rights of missing and exploited children in the world.   With the number of street kids growing every year, to which why, how can it be our children of 2019 have to rationalize the "streets" are better than .....?   The answers are simple, the children are the last we listen to and repeat what they say to the very adults they need help in enduring.  Laws are even written requiring abusive parents are to be reunified with the very child they abused.   

     Documented, I ran-away from home 101 times before my mother had no other choice for my own safety place me in the care of a home in another state from any family.   I was angry for so many reasons, the first and foremost, was my sister and I were being sexually molested and there was NO ONE we could tell. We did not want to disappoint anyone, our shame and guilt that we had caused it as it kept happening, not just by one member of the family, it was like a pass around game.  Not until our 40's did we even talk to each other about "who" and that is only because they are all deceased.   Even to this day we shield our mom, from the details of our stories.  Her big heart has the hurt of a true mother's heart,  as she too has her own childhood abuse nightmare. 

     Only after near death experiences from abusive adult relationships, self-sabotage when life was going good, drug/alcohol addiction issues - to where my sister is 12 years clean and alive, some of us found therapy while incarcerated and I found intensive therapy after I was left for dead by a "trusted" friend of over 16 years.   Run-away's will keep running until someone truly hears their story.   

     Covenant House NINE line 1-800-999-9999 or the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children for help with law enforcement 1-800-843-5678

     

 

  Chasing Bubbles 

  #SurvivorSpeaks   this is Jeff's survivor voice

     The day I met JR he was barely 21.  Most waitresses would of looked at Jeffrey when he came into their restaurant as a homeless kid.  He asked for only what he could afford that first day, even left his last bit of change for a tip.  

     After about three months he came in and did not sit in his usual section.  He went straight to the back and told me he just needed to warm up and did not have enough money to eat.  I had already had his usual order in and a cup of coffee ready to deliver.  I told him, "it is okay, customers have been generous today so lunch is on me."   He began to tear up, so I sat down and told him I was also on break.  His eyes sent tears streaming down his face.  From a physically abusive alcoholic father he never knew what he would walk into and a mother who had given up on herself she reach morbid weight and he was directly responsible for her personal care and he was ready to commit suicide that very day.  

     Through the tears and he continued to detail his life.  Many steps were taken the following days which led to years of follow up.  JR currently is a successful man, owns his own home and lives free of abuse and still to this day he continues to help other men find healing past the trauma of childhood abuse.   

     



 Brief Story of Tina Stewart   (Tina Stewart Foundation)

November 24, 2019

   In Memory of a Fighter whose life was taken in a domestic violence murder.  Tina was brutally murdered while the offenders family was in the living room watching TV.  They did not want to hear the fighting so the volume on the TV was turned up and Tina lay 8 hours on the floor before the offender realized he killed her.    Today, the Tina Stewart Foundation is a national foundation seeking to have a DV Offender Registry in all States.